Gift from the Sea is not only a great book on being a woman, it is also a wonderful meditation on middle age
This, Anne Morrow Lindbergh writes, is the essence of ‘coming of age’:
To learn how to stand alone
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sub rosa 
I had a young woman, an Uber driver actually, correct me when I said I was old. “You’re not old, you’re a beautiful, strong, fierce woman.” So I asked her, “Isn’t there a time when you can say, ‘I don’t have to try so hard anymore, I can get let go of most of that now?'” *sigh*
I love her Lindbergh’s advice not to compete with the overactive & under-wise. We inhabit, or can dwell in, a different place & space.
Thank you, Sigrun. I have been slowly learning this these days. It’s warming to see it said so well.
I can’t help but wonder: compete at what exactly?
I understand her to mean that middle age is a time for going deeper into the themes of life that interests us, accepting that there are things, relations, goals … we have to let go.
I think we have to figure out for ourselves what constitutes “unnatural effort.” At whatever age we may find ourselves!
There is a sign on the wall of my yoga studio, the first line of which reads, ‘When we are tense, all we observe is our own tension’ – which is perhaps similar observation. I too have an old Virago copy of this book on my shelf, and get it down now and then.
Interesting & yes, a great observation – thank you!